Friday, May 19, 2006

all freaks, no geeks

The worst has happened, the tabloid reports turn out to be true, Jodie Marsh's nan et al have gone into the house.

  • Bono - what language is she speaking? could BB please provide sub-titles? Her brother is called Clyde, some people should not be allowed to reproduce.
  • Pete - he's in a band, he likes to dress up, oh and he's got Tourette's. It is the law that he shall always be referred to as 'Tourette's sufferer Pete'. He's the one with the hamster.
  • George - hurrah, a posh one for us to hate, comprende?
  • Shahbaz - I was liking the knitting and the Bay City Rollers' Jacket, I went off him when the shrieking started. And went on. And on.
  • Lea - or 'Busty Lea' as it is mandatory to call her. Jodie Marsh's nan, & Pete Burns wannabe. 35 my @rse.
  • Imogen - Welsh stunna etc etc. Seemed quite nice actually.
  • Mikey - hates ugly people (must suffer terrible self-loathing then) and feminists. Not nice.
  • Dawn - my favourite on day 1. Thinks life's depressing and doesn't want to make friends. Says "I point out people's mistakes, which I am always right about as I never lose an argument". Actually I think she's me.
  • Glyn - 'North Wales' Sexiest Lifeguard'. How many lifeguards are there in N. Wales?
  • Richard - compulsory outrageous gay man [insert "why do they have to ram it down our throats" gag here]
  • Grace - another posho for us to despise, BB you are spoiling us!
  • Lisa - I like Lisa based purely on Manc solidarity. If she calms down she could be good, I think.
  • Sezer - loadsamoney innit
  • Nikki - she can't really be like that, can she?
Quite possibly the worst batch ever (it is also the law that you have to say that about every series). Production team going all out for fights and shagging this year.

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