Saturday, January 29, 2005

oh no, not Bez too!

Bez is reportedly the latest BigBro 'star' to make a fitness vid.
'Celebrity Big Brother' winner Bez may be set to resurrect the moves that made him famous when dancing for the Happy Mondays for a new dance workout video.
[note to Brand Republic: repeat after me - DVD DVD DVD. 'Video' is so last century]

Pete Doherty's failure to go into the CBB house surely presents a lost opportunity for the diet book/dvd industry. His 'Get the Junkie Waif Look' product range would've been a best seller for sure.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

CBB "fixed to promote at home with the Bez-bournes" shock allegations

Bez to star in C4 Osbournes-style fly-on-the-wall series

Channel 4 is planning a fly-on-the-wall documentary series for 'Celebrity Big Brother' winner Bez and hopes it will be as popular as 'The Osbournes', which is in its final series.
Happy Mondays' singer Shaun Ryder and 'X Factor' runner-up Rowetta, who are still good friends with Bez, could also play a starring role in the documentary.
However, there have been suggestions that Channel 4 helped Bez to win the show by editing him in a better light than his housemates. The tabloid reports claim Channel 4 were already in negotiations for Bez to star in the documentary and wanted to endear him to the British public to make the fly-on-the-wall series more popular.

On winning 'Celebrity Big Brother', Bez went on a celebratory bender and missed his scheduled appearance on Channel 4's 'Richard & Judy'.

Channel 4 has rigorously denied the claims and insists the show is not edited to influence voters.

all over till the next time

Celebrity Big Brother is all over, so I've taken down the links from the sidebar and archived them for posterity in this post.

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

The life and the legend

The Mirror are publishing extracts from Bez's (old) book Freaky Dancin.
The son of a policeman, Bez - real name Mark Berry - rebelled against his comfortable childhood. He was thrown out of home at 16, lived in a shed for six months, went joyriding, robbed a golf club and did time even before he found fame with Shaun Ryder in the frenzied, drug-fuelled Manchester music scene of the late 1980s.

Here, the Celebrity Big Brother victor tells his astonishing life story in his own inimitable voice...


Monday, January 24, 2005

Ratings, papers and stuff

In the guardian.

Former Happy Monday Bez's unlikely victory on last night's Celebrity Big Brother live final attracted the biggest audience of the series, with more than 5 million viewers tuning in.

Former Happy Monday Bez's unlikely victory on last night's Celebrity Big Brother live final attracted the biggest audience of the series, with more than 5 million viewers tuning in.
Bez won out against fellow finalists Danish actress Brigitte Nielsen and Kenzie from Blazin' Squad in last night's Celebrity Big Brother - the Live Final, broadcast on Channel 4 between 9pm and 10.05pm.

All the papers seem to be going for the happy Sunday headline.

The mail say about Bez

The 40-year-old said he would be "forever grateful" to the show.

"I was in a great deal of trouble," he said. "I was in a heap of shit. Now I've bailed out and I'm forever grateful."

The 24 Hour Party person said he had enjoyed his time in the house despite saying it had been his worst nightmare while he was there.

The Mancunian said he was worried about his sons and how being in the show had affected them.

"It's a constant stress for me," he told Davina. Saying he would use his £50,000 prize money for "pimping my ride", he did a trademark dance to the crowd with his hands in the air.

Bez got 54% of the vote to become last night's winner.

John in the independant

The mutton chop monster who metamorphoses into Mr Kindness.
His Big Brother housemates are having a private reunion tomorrow evening, which he finds bewildering. "Those morons, can you believe it? They want to spend even more time together. Lunatics. Apart from Germaine [Greer] the only one I had any time for was Lisa [I'Anson]. She used the c-word on me and had the balls to sort me out. But she didn't stimulate me, brain-wise. The only one who did was Germaine. I've never changed my mind about someone so quickly. My God, the depth of her knowledge. When she left I said, 'For God's sake get her back. Give her a rainforest, whatever it takes'. Without her I knew I would vegetate. The others had absolutely nothing of interest to say."

Yeah, Bez!

Bez won! Bez! Won! I was shocked! Everyone said Kenzie would win ha ha. It was all too rushed for me, 60 mins is not enough, but then I wasn't that bothered. Good old Germaine, Davina said 'I must say I'm surprised to see you here considering you hate us' and she replied 'It's in my contract' HA she wants her money you know. I have not liked Davina this series at all. Shame Brigitte couldn't say what she really thought about Jackie turning up as Jackie was sat right behind her during the interview. I really wanted a BBLB to finish the series off s'not fair.

Oh well we will always have this from the real the pic!

click here

Sunday, January 23, 2005

quarter of a million squid raised for charideee

as Davina told us (after initially getting it wrong, dontcha just lurv her professionalism). That's less than the combined fees reportedly paid to the HMs. In fact it's less than just Brigitte and Caprice combined are said to have been paid. Ah well, it's all for charity.

pimpin' up me motor

MoonMonkey wins CBB. Blimey. Bookies didn't expect that and nor did I. Sad that Brigitte didn't win but glad that the Boy Wonder didn't. Also loved the way Bez's body language screamed 'stop f*ckin' touching me woman!" at Davina.

It's the last day!

Jezzer in the mirror.

Celebrity Big Brother reject Jeremy Edwards has spoken for the first time of his heartbreak over his split with fiancee Rachel Stevens.

The 33-year-old said he could not even bear to be in the same room as the former S Club singer after she dumped him last year.

But the actor told the Sunday Mirror he was terrified that Big Brother was about to bring his ex into the house as a mystery guest.

He struggled through bouts of depression last year as he tried to get over their broken engagement.

I can believe that. I saw all the pics of it walking his dog in Heat mag with long hair, that hair screamed depression to me. I should be a doctor.

In the people James MacKenzie's not so secret WILD MAN ON TOUR type things.
BONKED 15 girls during a recent tour - including two in one day - as the randy band held a "shagging contest."

-WOWS women in bed by using a secret "spindle finger" sex technique on them.

-BLOWS thousands of pounds on booze.

-TRASHES hotel rooms with the rest of the band - including urinating in the kettles - and was banned by one chain.

-FANTASISED about bedding housemates Caprice and Brigitte in a threesome.

Ha. Dermot is having hard time controlling Jackie and John on BBLB.

Bestest friends 4 ever!

Aww Brigitte and Kenzie say they are going to swap their house and mobile numbers. Kenzie says he wouldn't give just his management number out as that would be disrespectful.

Previously on CBB...

That task where Bez won money was odd wasn't it? They've already been paid to be in the house, so why more cash?

Final day...

I don't really care who wins. How odd. I just don't understand how the last show is only 65 mins long that is rubbish, and there is no BBLB after it. Boo.

Saturday, January 22, 2005

Q&A: John McCririck

from today's Guardian
What is your greatest fear?
Being denied euthanasia.

Bets off after Big Brother 'leak'

A bookmaker has stopped taking bets on Celebrity Big Brother after claiming "sensitive information" about the Channel 4 show had been leaked.

William Hill made the move after four people tried to place bets on Friday's surprise double eviction.

"This is highly unlikely to have been an inspired guess," William Hill spokesman Rupert Adams said.

However, a Big Brother spokeswoman was "satisfied" that sensitive information about the show remained confidential.

from the BBC

Friday nights double eviction - a proper report

courtesty of BBC News
Double eviction from Big Brother

Model Caprice and Holby City actor Jeremy Edwards have both left the Celebrity Big Brother house in a surprise double eviction on Friday.

Caprice, who left in the scheduled fourth eviction having gained just 5% of the public vote, afterwards said: "I am so happy, I am so glad I'm out."

Edwards then left in a surprise eviction, with 12% of the vote.

Friday, January 21, 2005

good riddance to bad rubbish

Hah. Jeremy evicted, he was not expecting that. Obv thought his charm and good looks would keep him in till the end. Hah. Ha ha ha ha. Smugly slimed his way thro his interview with Davvy, clearly taken aback that the rest of the nation failed to find him utterly tattyfilarious. Get orf my telly, horrid man.

Oh and Caprice got evicted first. Whatever.

Funniest thing EVER! hmm

According to Richard and Judy, Kenzie being dressed as Humpty Dumpty is the funniest thing ever on a celeb BB. Judy said her family were rolling around on the floor as it was so funny. Wtf? I give up. It was mildly amusing I a 'look at those idiots' sort of way.

betting news

William Hill make Caprice the 1/12 favourite to be evicted from the Big Brother house this evening. 1/12 is the lowest price for any contestant to be evicted in Big Brother History and still customers are placing bets. Its the same story with the outright betting where Kenzie is attracting all the money regardless of his short price.

"Punters want a slice of the action on Caprice to be evicted and Kenzie to win whatever the price. Such fanatical support is a rarity in bookmaking and perhaps suggests that there are insiders privy to the last public vote figure, who are looking for some easy money. We will be monitoring the situation closely and if we have to close the book then we will." said Hills spokesman Rupert Adams

Latest William Hill Eviction Betting: 1/12 Caprice, 8/1 Jeremy Edwards, 9/1 Bez, 20/1 Brigitte Nielsen, 50/1 Kenzie

Hills Latest Outright Betting: 1/5 Kenzie, 11/2 Brigitte Nielsen, 11/2 Bez, 16/1 Jeremy Edwards, 50/1 Caprice

thanks to

Friday's papers

  • Caprice next to leave, say bookies

  • Rowetta backs Bez for chart comeback

  • Caprice faces boot as Brigitte cries over spilt beer
    Bez did not amuse fellow housemate Brigitte Nielsen, ... in the early hours today when he accidentally poured beer over her. The Mancunian tried to laugh it off and told Brigitte: "Oh stop your moaning!" But she did not take up the peace offering and stormed: "I’ll knock the teeth out of your mouth if you ever speak to me like that again."

    BRIGITTE Nielsen and Jeremy Edwards have torn into Caprice - with the actor mocking her for not going topless. ... he joked: "She hasn't got her knockers out even once. She's a bit selfish on that front."
    horrid. little. man.

  • Hat's the way aha aha ...

    Loving Brigitte's work

    ooh a different hat

    awww she loves her panda bless

    tsk smoking bad bad also bad hat. Badness all round, v disappointed.

    Oh yeah and Jeremy out, Brigitte to win (except Caprice will be evicted on Friday and Kenzie's gonna win cos of all those girly gurls bah)

    Thursday, January 20, 2005

    from Thursday's papers

  • Stallone movie sales boost - Sales of Sylvester Stallone's movies on DVD and video have increased by around 300 percent following his mum Jackie's appearance on Celebrity Big Brother. And many of the people who bought them will have the vote. Scarey.

  • OUT.. LISA I'AMGONE - MOUTHY Lisa I'Anson was finally lost for words last night as she was kicked out of the Big Brother house in a secret eviction. One of lots of similar stories.

  • Broke Bez after £50,000 - BEZ is desperate to win the £50,000 first prize because he is broke, it was reported last night. It sez in the Sun

  • Kenzie hides his feelings - Jeremy Edwards had to stop him, whispering: “You can’t do that! Put it away.” TMI eeew.

  • Ratings Slump after John Evicted

  • our next obsession?

    coming soon to ITV1 Saturday Night - "Strictly Come Wrestling"

    ITV is set to fill its primetime Saturday night slot with 'Celebrity Wrestling', having signed up Princess Diana's former lover James Hewitt, Playboy playmate Victoria Silvstedt and 'Big Brother' winner Kate Lawler to take part.

    Six men and six women will dress in tight Lycra and be given gladiator-style names for the series, due to air in March.

    Other contestants lined up for the men's event include: athlete Iwan Thomas; Jade Goody's former partner Jeff Brazier; ex-'EastEnders' actor Marc Bannerman, who played Gianni de Marco; showjumper Oliver Skeete; and children's TV presenter Mark Speight.

    Grappling against Silvstedt and Lawler will be Liberty X singer Michelle Heaton, Page Three pin-up Leilani Dowding, former tennis star Annabel Croft, with the D-list line-up completed by 'Wheel of Fortune' hostess Jenny Powell.

    The winner of each group will be crowned King and Queen of the ring.

    'X Factor''s Kate Thornton will present the show, with former WWF wrestler Rowdy Roddy Piper taking on co-presenting duties.

    Stephen Newton told us about it. Honeslty, he seems to think we'll watch anything. I have no idea what would make him think that. Koff.

    Wednesday, January 19, 2005

    Lisa Gone

    The vaginally challenged Queen of Mouth is out. Feigning happiness as BB told her in the diary room she was ushered out the back door to boos. Seems the crowd only know how to boo if you ask me. Twats.
    Anyways...She says Caprice is her 'baby' WTF does that mean? Some Blazing Squad talk learnt from the dynamic Kenzie? Caprice is really a very tall ten year old?
    Also she told us all that Jeremy is soooo intelligent. Right. Took a fair while for the penny to drop that Lisa had vanished. Then he swore blind that she 'must have known' all day as BB would never have removed her like that. Duh Jeremy...Yawn yawn. Didn't you watch the last series mate? It's all been done before. Oh maybe as you're so 'intelligent' you were reading the English Dictionary at that moment.
    Lisa wants Kenzie to win. Drumming up some public relations with the yoff of today there eh Lisa?
    It won't work.

    you're my best mate you are

    Lisa, dressed as Little Bo Peep, went into the diary room allegedly to be seeker, while the other HMs hid. She was spirited out of the side door and out to a fawning interview with Davina. Thus far BB exit interviews have been refreshingly free of all that 'I love them all, we've really bonded' guff people spout after knowing each other for a couple of days. Free of all that guff until Lisa tonight. I loves them all blah blah vom good riddance.

    gratuitous hat pic

    who nominated whom (or not)

    well they thought they were nominating but it was all a con by BB, the nominations won't count. If they did, Bez and Brigitte would be up for eviction.

    Bez: Jeremy and Lisa
    Brigitte: Bez and Caprice
    Caprice: Bez and Brigitte
    Jeremy: Brigitte and Caprice
    Kenzie: Bez and Brigitte
    Lisa: Bez and Kenzie


    Surprise eviction wooo. I wonder if they will be as confoosed as the BB5ers were when Stu left? Or will "BB Fan" Jez realise what's happened?

    right well as far as I know our living room is not booked for meetings tonight and I will unplug my phone so I don't have to provide tech support for my parents all thro BB (like wot I had to do thro ER t'other night grr after I missed BB too waaah). Cava and pistachios here I come!


    Police are wondering if Bez took drugs into the house or not in the sun. Also in the sun they say a housemate will be secretly evicted tonight during a tea party through the diary room like Stu was in the last BB.

    This is Davina do not say feck or bugger

    Ha ha they have had pretend nominations that mean nothing. I hope Lisa doesn't go tonight, she should stay just for the swearing at John the other morning. Talking of swearing, how stupid was Davina's 'this is Davina do not swear' said after half an hour of constant swearing last eviction night. I know it's your catch phrase love, but the evictions are after nine now and swearing (as we have heard you'd have to be deaf not to) is allowed. I wish they would beep some of the swearing (and not just the C word) as it is tiresome.

    Tuesday, January 18, 2005

    Gosh the BIG celebs come out

    Dermot is interviewing the massive celeb stars Jonathan Wilkes and Mylene Klass tonight. Kinda sums up the z list celeb status of the show.
    John was appalling on BBLB talking about sex. Apparently he's some kind of stud in bed. Offering to 'service' some guys wife for a treat.
    Thankfully he won't be on all week.
    Has anyone noticed that Lisa has a laugh like a hyena with bronchitis?

    Cleverly deserves a post of it's own

    in the comments box in reply to Jude's post about Jeremy having to use Queen song titles in his convo

    Thanks to Stephen
    Stephen said...
    Clarrie, I know I'm going slightly mad, but I think you may be rushing headlong into innuendo. After all, it's a hard life, and I want to break free, but you're my best friend and who wants to live forever, anyway? I feel like the invisible man, waiting for the hammer to fall, but friends will be friends and with a kind of magic we'll win the bicycle race and find somebody to love (Me? I'm in love with my car). And failing that, I'll listen to the radio, ga-ga for some music from Gershwin, who was a bit of a bohemian. Rapsody in Blue is my favorite, but then I want it all.

    Don't stop me now, because this is some kind of breakthrough, I think it's going to save me although thinking all this up is a killer. Queen of reality TV, do you think Jezza will succeed? After all, the show must go on...

    (He's mad me thinks)

    Jezza's mini task

    Jeremy has a task all to himself. He has to mention Queen songs in passing conversation to the other housemates without them realising what he is doing in order to win a reward for all. He has to mention the songs 'Another One Bites The Dust', 'Under Pressure' and 'Fat Bottomed Girls' plus a few genius Jez has to think of himself.

    no more noms

    I -heart- the hatAll the celebs are up for voting now. You vote for who you want to win. The HMs with the least votes will be evicted on Wednesday and Friday.

    Voting information here, if you must sully yourself.

    Go Brigitte!

    Monday, January 17, 2005

    John Out

    Well the dreadful John has finally gone from the house. The interview with Davina was pretty cringe making. To start he would let her speak, instead he kept shouting on about how great England and the public were.
    Then they showed him a tape of him acting like a total buffoon with the diet coke incident. They morphed him into a green hulk type monster. He was not impressed and got really angry. Davina looked a bit worried.
    His favourite in the house was apparently, the irresistible to men, Lisa. Why? Because she called him a C***.
    Easy to please type of guy then?
    Personally I shall avoid BBLB like the plague. If I never see the ugly sexist old looney on my TV scene again it will be too soon.

    John evicted

    apparantly. I wouldn't know, I can't watch it.
    /eats worms (vegetarian)


    ffs my other half is holding top seekrit meeting in the living room and I can't watch BB eviction aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.


    The eviction is tonight then? I thought it was tomorrow or Wednesday!

    odds & sods

    assorted betting news courtesy of readaBet (whose site goes all weird in firefox tsk tsk tsk)
    • Favourite to win: Kenzie
    • Next eviction: some say Bez is fave, some say John, woo it's looking close
    • Caprice & Jeremy to get married: 50/1
    • Caprice to have a top 5 single (please deity no): 16/1
    • Jackie Stallone & Michael Jackson to appear in ad for plastic surgery: 50/1
    • Jeremy to be the next James Bond: 50/1
    • Kenzie to have a solo No. 1: 10/1
    • Lisa to get regular slot on Radio 1 again (hahahaha dream on): 16/1
    • John to appear in: Diet Coke as 6/1; Blazin Squad vid 7/1; McDonalds ad 12/1; M&S undies ad 40/1; Celeb Fit Club 4/1; What not to wear 16/1
    • Rowetta & Bez collaboration to make the Top3: 8/1

    Bez favourite for eviction?

    according to Madchester Evening News morning edition

    HAPPY Mondays star Bez is a surprise favourite to be evicted from the Celebrity Big Brother house tonight after throwing a series of tantrums.

    Sunday, January 16, 2005

    They don't like you much, either

    Well I was gonna post about how I was liking Brigitte and Bez. Right up till Bez's "I hate the fuggin' Germans me" remark. Now I've gone right off the silly little man. Big boo hiss bah also for Lisa, Caprice and especially horrid Jeremy.

    Mind you I haven't been paying attention much for the past couple of days, so have missed whatever Bez did the other night and whatever else has gone on.

    Hurrah for Brigitte's hat.

    I love Brigitte

    I love her because she wears that pink hat on tv.

    who nominated whom

    Bez: Brigitte and Kenzie
    Brigitte: Bez and John
    Caprice: Bez and John
    Jeremy: Bez and Brigitte
    John: Brigitte and Jeremy
    Kenzie: Bez and John
    Lisa: Bez and John

    Back to the blue room

    They are in the blue room that Caprice was in the other day (through the tunnel) They each have to put on the hat of truth (helmet with stuff stuck to it) and answer questions written on stones. They have fetching pink kaftans on for this task btw.

    First question was 'what is your biggest vice and why'?

    John - says his is over eating

    Jez - says coffee

    Kenzie - says alcohol especially spirits

    Caprice - dunno was boring then the sound went

    Lisa - fags

    Brigitte - being outspoken

    Next question was 'if you had to lose a sense which one'?

    Umm just realised Bez isn't there! Dunno where he is.

    House is now a 'rejuvenation retreat'

    Apparently. Task news here. Sounds boring doesn't it?
    An early morning gong woke the gang to the news that the House is now a "Rejuvenation Retreat" aimed at giving the housemates a spiritual and physical cleansing.

    Housemates will be asked to shed their current names and adopt a name closer to nature - such as 'moonbeam or "starfruit' - which they must use throughout the task duration.


    The noms are in and...

    John and Bez are up for eviction. On BBLB a few people say that they want John to stay in and be more annoying and repulsive but will this be reflected in the Blazin Squad fans text voting? Probably not.

    Vote to save Bez! (so I don't have to)

    text BEZ to 84444
    (50p plus your STD network rate)

    Or go to the BBLB charities page and send one of them 50p instead.

    More Germaine

    Germaine in The Times today on her life in the BB house, all six pages of it.

    Neither Caprice nor Lisa nor Brigitte ever said a witty thing. Kenzie and Jeremy often did, Jeremy in so deadpan a fashion that the girls didn’t get it. John, on the other hand, invariably laughed at his own jokes, which were often nasty and seldom funny.

    Look who liked the boys over the girls, hmph. Poor stupid girls not getting Jeremy's jokes.


    I guess they passed the task then as they have beer pitchers and costumes! Kenzie and Jeremy just made a slight mistake of calling Jordan 'really clever' in ear range of Lisa. Lisa respects her (ha HA) for being a single mother but...she isn't giving Jordan any compliments I don't think somehow. Lisa and Brigitte are dancing to Amadeus by Falco! The next music is by Franz Ferdinand, Jeremy shouted out 'It's The Strokes' oh no it isn't Jezzer. There is bad dancing but Bez isn't up off the settee yet.

    Saturday, January 15, 2005

    Ghost train

    They have a ghost train obstacle task. Each housemate has to drive the train round the course with a spiked helmet and a blindfold on. They are dressed as skeletons and draculas. The other housemates can shout instructions. They have to burst one balloon hanging above them with the helmets. Lisa is making a big drama out of the task instructions. They are meant to avoid bursting the balloons on the ground but first driver Bez seemed to burst a large amount of them. By the time the last person (John) came to do it the 'ghost train' was broken. Big brother will examine the ghost train and if it is broke they will pass the task. John is whining 'why me'?
    Housemates have made their second lot of nominations. According to the offish site Bez thinks he may be up and Jezzer thinks John may be kept in for a lark by the oh so cruel public/the blazin squad fans who actually bother to text in.

    Then again, Jeremy also has an interesting theory on John's odds. Jeremy reckons the public might just keep John in to frustrate him. "I think anyone who goes up against you will lose out," he argued.

    Ooh John McC is the new John Tickle, god help us.
    Urgh Davina and urgh BBLB. I am not happy with either of you. When I see Davina nowadays I just see EVIL (is that over the top?) she is the voice of the producers Endemol (who as we know promised Jackie geniuses and chandeliers HA HA). Next on my EVIL list is Jeremy, laughing at an 80 year old woman trying to find their way in the dark? Maybe it is just me but NOT FUNNY. His behaviour when Jackie was evicted was awful (clapping, whooping and saying he didn't need a minute to say goodbye) does he think she can't hear or see?

    Anyway BRIGITTE to win.

    Friday, January 14, 2005

    Jackie Out

    My God. That woman is freaky. Davina's interview was awful but mainly because the freak didn't have a clue what she was talking about. She thought she was volunteering for some big brother 'mentoring' programme. Though frankly what that woman could teach anyone beats me.
    Davina kept hugging her and she kept pulling back in annoyance. You don't actually touch in Hollywood 'dahling'.
    Davina was amazed she didn't know how to do ANYTHING. Well that's money badly spent my dear. Who cleans if they can pay someone else to do it.
    I'm actually amazed anyone at all voted. I mean some people out there actually voted for John..... Weirdos.

    Jackie evicted

    First person to be evicted from CBB is Jackie Stallone. John looked gutted it wasn't him. How much money, if any, might John have put on himself to be first out?

    Poor Caprice

    She's been shown tapes of the other housemates talking about her. Oh John, dream on!

    John then returned to the screen to discuss who he would like to make love to in the House. Caprice looked on grim-faced.

    "I would least like to make love to Caprice," he said. "Now any man would say, 'he's got something wrong with him. Perfect body, perfect breasts.' Everything like that. But cold, calculating, inanimate. So wrapped up in herself."

    offish site.
    Ooh err Caprice has gone through a secret door and is sitting in a chair with binoculars. She's in a lift outside going upwards and the other housemates are waving at her! Hmm is it a lift or just a glass room? I's definitely raised. John is shouting 'get errm off' at Caprice.

    Hmm (again) they did this (put people in a glass box) on 'back to reality' you know.

    It's officially a 'container' BB just said ha.

    She's back in the house she can't tell the rest what she has to do.

    Pic up on offish site now and story.

    Another walker?

    Jackie wants to leave and has gone to the diary room. No doubt they will persuade her to stay they won't be able to kick anyone out tonight if she goes today.

    In Defence of Germaine

    Emily Wilson in the Guardian
    Germaine Greer has been viciously attacked by her fellow female commentators for going on Big Brother. But why the shock and anger, asks Emily Wilson. It's not as if it was out of character


    The Times again. Today we hear from Booby.

    The Booby prize . . . life with the world's worst husband by Carol Midgley.

    Jenny McCririck tells of what it’s like being married to a man who calls her a booby, never buys her presents and glories in his role as Celebrity Big Brother’s male chauvinist pig...

    Prats for Justice 'raid' BB house

    Fifteen fathers' rights protesters have been arrested after entering the Celebrity Big Brother compound and throwing fireworks early on Friday.
    At least one of the group was dressed as Superman - a popular outfit for the protesters.

    The police, who had been tipped of about a possible stunt, sent 12 officers and a police helicopter with heat-seeking equipment to the compound.
    It appeared from live coverage of the Big Brother house that contestants continued to sleep as the protest progressed.

    From BBC news

    Thursday, January 13, 2005

    who nominated whom

    Bez: Jackie and John
    Brigitte: John and Jackie
    Caprice: John and Jackie
    Jackie: Bez and Jeremy
    Jeremy: Jackie and Lisa
    John: Bez and Caprice
    Kenzie: John and Jackie
    Lisa: John and Jackie

    click here
    for voting info.

    Julie on Germaine

    My feminist hero has become a rancid bore by Julie Burchill.

    Our correspondent turned down the chance to appear in Celebrity Big Brother and then watched as her former idol, Germaine Greer, made a fool of herself...


    Great. As trailed on Richard and Judy at teatime (nice) John is on about 'cleavage sex' again tonight.

    first nominations

    JackieJackie and John are up for eviction this week. Not really a surprise, except that didn't they say when she went in that Jackie was exempt from nominations but could 'influence' events? Or maybe that was just for the nominations that got cancelled after Germaine left? Who knows? Who cares? John Not sure if I do anymore. Jackie entering and Germaine leaving may just have finished off my interest in CBB.

    Anyways, if you're still interested and you must vote, details are here. Remember that you are voting for you want to keep in the house, not for who you want to leave. Also remember that half the money from your vote goes to charity - if you want all your money to go to charity, see our sidebar.

    Midnight feasts

    Why do they eat huge meals at night (ok only Bez and Kenzie are eating). Brigitte is making some big fish meal at one o clock at night. She has a lovely pink hat on and seems to have taken over the cooking from the departed Germaine.

    Wednesday, January 12, 2005

    Odd John odds

    From readabet.
    William Hill have been asked by a number of their punters for odds on John McCririck to take part in an official Diet Coke advert. Hills make it a 5/1 shot but think it is more likely that John will appear in Celebrity Fit Club which is offered at 3/1.

    I don't think non skinnies are allowed in diet coke ads. He's a natural for celeb fit club though there is always an annoying one who won't do anything.

    sweet dreams my bb ex?

    Apparantly, Jeremy's threatened to walk. After the Jackie Stallone thing, he's afeared they'll bring in Rachel Stevens. Nice work BB, keep them in a permanent state of fear and paranoia.

    Wednesday's Papers

  • Why I said yes to Big Brother's shilling (Germaine writing in the Telegraph)
    I have been without any means of telling the time, or writing a word, except with a finger in the sand. I, who have spent my entire life reading, even if it was only the text on the back of the crispies packet or the flap of someone else's newspaper, have been in a totally text-free space.

    So why did I put myself through this entirely avoidable ordeal? My reason is the rainforest. I finance the rehabilitation of my 125 acres in south-east Queensland entirely out of my taxed income. If something were to happen to me, the project would collapse in a matter of days. Accepting the Celebrity Big Brother challenge has earned me a lump of cash that will be the rainforest cushion.
    In my deepest heart, in the dead of night, I discover another reason for betaking myself to the Big Brother house. For a few days at least, I have been living something like the life my mother leads in a nursing home in Victoria. She, too, believes that in a few days she will be going back to her own house.

    She has no autonomy and no privacy whatsoever. ... For my mother, there's only one way out of the Big Brother house. God forbid that I should complain.

  • Greer takes reality check and walks out on 'Big Brother' (Independent)

  • Greer walks out of 'bullying' Big Brother (Guardian)

  • We'll Jack it in! (Sun)
    ALL the Big Brother celebrities threatened to quit last night after the Jackie Stallone stunt backfired — sparking a mutiny.

  • Who's top of the ops? (Sun)
    Sun speculates on which BB celebs have had plastic surgery, then lays into John for his less than perfect bod. Is it any wonder people have plastic surgery dur?

  • BULLY BOYS Germaine blasts show bosses (Mirror)

  • SHELLEY ON BIG BROTHER The've lost Germaine Greer and gained a ga-ga woman (Mirror)

  • HE'S THE BEZ BET (Daily Record)

  • WHY JOHN IS FIZZING OVER COLA by Booby (Daily Record)

  • on Jackie entering & Germaine leaving

    So, I've been thinking about this (hey, it beats working). I think maybe bringing Jackie in was getting just too tacky, even for Big Brother. I particularly don't like it because it defines a woman (Brigitte) by who she used to be married to. It reduces her to just being the ex-Mrs Sly Stallone. She's been divorced from him for nearly 20 years, ffs!

    I wonder what Germaine would have said if she hadn't had to suffer Davina's p*ss poor interviewing. Davina, let people (particularly ones who are Professors of English) chose their own words. Whatever her reasons, I think you do have to admire Germaine for just upping and leaving once she'd made her mind up, not having the endless dithering and oh-go-on-persuade-me-to-stay antics we sometimes see.

    Wish she'd stayed, tho.

    BBLB saddos!

    The BBLB audience are quite rubbish. They were all happy Germaine had left which is the first time I had heard that view from one person let alone a whole group! Blah. Davina interviewing Germaine was poor as well.

    Tuesday, January 11, 2005

    Germaine in the diary room

    Did she think everyone was there just for charity or something?

    What she said.

    "I don't consider myself a housemate anymore, I'm leaving. I don't need the money badly enough, the rainforest will be fine - I'll save it in other ways.

    I was a little naïve. I didn't realise agendas. Caprice is here to raise awareness of her lingerie. Brigitte is a professional reality TV person. Kenzie wants to raise the profile of his band. John probably needs the money. I had no idea who would be in here and it's wrong for me to present myself in the same context as they are. I'm 65 and you can't teach an old dog new tricks.

    I've made a mistake, it's called cutting your losses."

    John tut tut

    He just said someone is second only to the bride of Wildenstein. I didn't hear whooooooo he was talking about but I think I can have a guess! Now he is saying how he changed his mind completely about Germaine aww. They think there will be no nominations today. Boo.

    Germaine latest

    According to the Grauniad, it could all be about food. Maybe she wanted her diet coke, too?
    There was some hint that she was leaving over meal allocations - as she was quietly folding her clothes into her suitcase she was asked by Caprice, who was still in bed, why she was leaving and she mentioned food rations.

    However, most of the conversation was censored by Channel 4 with a soundtrack of birdsong drowning out what was being said.

    But the live video feed on digital channel E4 suggested the argument may have been over Big Brother's decision not to open the larder where the food was stored.
    A bidding war is now expected to break out among national newspapers for Greer's story, with her explanation for getting involved in a show she had criticised three years earlier, guaranteed to sell copies.

    Germaine's left - confirmed

    from Brand Republic
    Feminist author Germaine Greer has left the 'Celebrity Big Brother' house, saying that she was leaving over 'specific issues'.

    The 65-year-old feminist author was called into the diary room at 11.47am and came out 20 minutes later. It is unclear what was said between Big Brother and Greer, but she was clearly upset and packed her bags to leave.

    Channel 4 has put a "walked" sign under her name on the Big Brother website with the sentence "Germaine left the house on 11th January".

    Greer gave no explanation surrounding her decision to go and only told housemates that there were specific reasons.

    "I'm leaving over specific issues, but best for everyone if I don't discuss them. I have a problem with decisions, I make them fast and when I make them, I stick to them."

    Elsewhere in the house, Brigitte Nielsen is experiencing the wrath of her former mother-in-law Jackie Stallone, who was the surprise ninth contestant to enter the 'Big Brother' house last night.

    "Oh my God, this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me. I was so happy and now I'm miserable," Nielsen said.

    Germaine Leaving?!?!!

    Germaine has told the HMs she's leaving. She's got her suitcase, is packing and says she's off. Gosh.

    Tuesday Papers


  • IT'S JOHNNY NO MATES.. (Mirror)

  • Rocky Horror Show (Sun)

  • Great Dane gets her claws out (Sun)

    THE Duchess of York has turned down a £1million pay day - by knocking back Celebrity Big Brother.

  • The third degree (Guardian)
    Professor Germaine Greer's descent into the bathos of Celebrity Big Brother may have disappointed some academic admirers, but they shouldn't be surprised. A couple of years ago she was grabbing cheap publicity in her efforts to be elected as rector of St Andrews.

  • My brush with Big Sister (Guardian) Germaine Greer's bitchy letter to former Big Brother contestant Elizabeth Woodcock.
    Dear Elizabeth Woodcock,

    I'm afraid your memory is playing you tricks. I wrote one article on Big Brother, or rather on "reality" television, of which I do not consider BB a particularly interesting example. I certainly do not wish to discuss the idea further with the participants. What I saw of them was more than enough. Please don't consider this a sign that I want to enter into a dialogue.

    Germaine Greer.

  • Take it to the Brig (Megastar)
  • Revolution!

    They claim to be giving up the task (2.30 in the morning after booze). Germaine wants to throw the crown somewhere but Lisa says they should give it back to the props department! John has started talking again. Germaine doesn't want to 'suck dick' and Brigitte wants to walk (and she wants BB to give her wine). She is upset about Jackie being there and reopening up media interest in her family. Which is fair enough.

    Just Jackie

    A picture tribute

    Educating Kenzie

    Brigitte is impressing Kenzie with her Flavor Flav tales aww. He is SO impressed (not sure he knew who she was on about until she mentioned Public Enemy though). It's a love in at the moment (silent John is in bed).

    Monday, January 10, 2005

    it's worse than we thought

    Sly's Mom
    The Sun was right for once. Jackie (mother of Sly) Stallone, the new Queen Mother of Big Brother arrives. We are scared. She makes the trout pout look posititively flattering.

    I think is my new favourite website.

    Silly Lisa

    Lisa has never heard of interactive big brother on E4! She said it doesn't go out live 24 hours a day as other shows are on! Jeremy told her about the magic red button that you press to see it at anytime. HA. They are locked in the bedroom.

    Jousting tournament

    On little bikes! The winner will get an individual prize. Kenzie and Brigitte are jousting against each other haha. It's very competitive. Queen Lisa says who wins, the final was between Bez and Kenzie the small child was declared the winner but Bez was whining so they did it again. Bez finally wins through dubious circumstances. Bez's prize is not having to take part in the task anymore or something. Great.

    Stop or we'll shoot his mom

    The Sun sez it could be Sly's psychic Mom. Please not.

    John's protest

    it's getting really rather dull now. While you do have to admire him for keeping up his Vow of Silence, it seems a fairly major over reaction to being deprived of diet coke. He was getting a kind of perverse popularity for his half witted outbursts, people wanted to keep him in cos he was interesting. Perhaps he was really serious about wanting to be voted out first (I never actually believe anyone who says that) and having realised he was in danger of becoming a Lovable Old Curmugeon (cf Michael Winner), has taken a different tack. He won't get paid if he walks before the end of the first week, apparently, so maybe this is his way of getting voted out quickly.

    Of course it could all be a ruse, and they'll be sending Booby in tonight to cheer him up.

    Monday papers

    not much in the papers today ...

  • Game show Greer splits the sisterhood (Times) Carole Caplin on why she's better than GG. No I'm not sniggering. Well not much.
  • McCririck finds going heavy under Greer-group pressure (Times)
  • Big Brother springs surprise contestant on housemates (Brand Republic)
    Possible candidates [for new HM] include US rapper Flavor Flav, who was recently seen cavorting with Brigitte Nielsen on VH1 reality show 'The Surreal Life' or Caprice's former lover, one-time Arsenal footballer Tony Adams.

    The new contestant could also be a virtual unknown because Kenzie, Lisa l'Anson, Bez, Germaine Greer and John McCririck's love lives have not made the celebrity gossip pages.

    Nielsens' exes, Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Jeremy Edwards' former girlfriend, popstar Rachel Stevens, are believed unlikely to appear.

    oh yes cos all Germaine's exes are virtual unknowns innit. I mean, who ever heard of George Best, Warren Beaty or Martin Amis. Note to Journos: people did have sex with slebs before the invention of Heat magazine.

  • Scared

    Germaine just said disequilibrating. Which is a big word.

    Teenage brat alert

    I did not like that Kenzie swearing at John in middle of the night ugh and the stupid posing, ick. I want him out. Yes John is an arse but so is Kenzie it would seem after a shandy or two. Poor Germaine, it is not fair to put people age 60 plus on roundabouts and spin them fast or make them spin them like John had to. I like the way Germaine put them in order of attractiveness very quickly with no argument ha.

    Sunday, January 09, 2005

    Live exciting royal update

    Jeremy is in the shower and John is snoring. Lisa's crown is heavy. Germaine has squirted tomato seeds over the royal bench. The 'boys' will be dancing later eep.

    father & son?

    Germaine's exes include George Best [1] and Caprice used to go out with Calum Best. Just a thought ...

    [1] also Martin Amis, Julian Barnes, Jonathan Aitken, Warren Beatty & John Peel - handy list here

    On the offish site

    It does say here
    One Housemate can expect a blast from their past to be arriving at the Royal Court real soon...
    so that sounds promising. I really want it be an ex, otherwise it's just copying 'back to reality' and 'I'm a celeb'...

    I'll start with Caprice

    Whose ex (and I am hoping it is an ex) will it be?

    Handy list of Caprice's ex boyfriends here.

    Tony Adams - possible

    WE were together for six months. But the relationship became so public it killed us. There were too many pressures.

    David Spade - some American actor I don't know

    OH my God! I didn't even call David to tell him I'd broken up with him. That's how bad I was.

    Christian Burn - umm who is he? Sounds a right charmer. Oh he is 'BBMak pop star Christian Burns' apparently. I hope it's him.

    "He broke up with me when he found out that my single went in at Number 24. Clearly it wasn't true love. I still think he's an OK guy."

    will it be Sly, Rachel or Molly?

    random Boston Terrier, not actually Molly
    could the new HM be Jeremy's dog? Aww go on, gratuitious Bichonit could be Paddy all over again awwwww

    oh no it's true

    It's on C4 site now.

    On Monday night a brand new arrival will be entering the House, but of course there has to be a twist. The new recruit will be in, or have previously had a relationship with one of the current Housemates.

    Bad idea. Bad bad bad.

    I will of course be glued to my telly on Monday night. But it's still a bad idea.

    9th Housemate rumours continue

    well they do at DigiSpy, anyways.

    A new celebrity will enter the house in a special live show tomorrow (Monday) night, it has been announced.

    Confirming previous speculation, the new housemate is either the partner of, or has had a past relationship with, one of the existing housemates. It appears that none of the group are aware of the impending arrival, however, as the news will be "a huge surprise" to them.

    It also appears that the housemate will be joining the group for the duration; Channel 4 refers to the newcomer as "the ninth celebrity."

    Oh I do hope it's not true.

    More BBLB hate

    Members of the so solid crew are not good guests and Mark 'editor of heat' Frith is boring especially when he agrees that readers of heat won't know much about Germaine. Yes that's right we are all idiots. Tomorrow's show looks much better as Justin Lee Collins is on.

    BBLB props

    Oh how hilarious, to include a 'dog' sticker amongst those given to the So Solids as part of their 'spotting' duties on BBLB. Feckin smug production gets, obviously think they are so kewl and witty for despising the HMs, esp the female ones. Not for the first time, either. Look, darlings, these people are bringing in the £ that keeps you in bolli-stolli-charlie so Shut Up.

    Sunday Papers

    not news but some people are interested in this kind of thing, apparantly
    Jeremy Edwards Shirtless Picture Gallery

    Jeremy watch

    Now don't say I never give you anything! Go over to fmforums for some Jezza screen caps.

    Day 3 in the BB house Germaine is watching Jeremy in his see through underwear...

    Saturday, January 08, 2005


    Assault course sounds mingin'.

    (Good to see the Scotsman keeping up their most excellent BB coverage, BTW).

    Meanwhile in betting news
    Ladbrokes spokesman Warren Lush said: “Jeremy is setting the early pace though we have seen good support for Kenzie in recent hours. Lisa I’Anson is the rank outsider at 33/1.

    As Ms J rightly observed Kenzie's fans are far and away more likely to txt vote loads of times. But they is too young to go to da bookies innit. Hey get me, I'm gettin down wif da yoof like me main man John wooo.

    do these people not watch tv?

    Not the Celeb HMs (tho you do have to wonder that so few of them seem to know anything about the house, and also that so called BB fan Jeremy was not behaving like any true BB fan on admittance to the house ie squealing "where's the door to the seekrit bedsit? omg is that the table they did it under?" etc). No, if this rumour is true, you have to wonder if the producers are far to busy taking recreational drucks to watch any other shows in their genre. Because if they had, they would surely know that the introduction of a seekrit new contestant and omg it's the partner of one of the existing ones has been done before (less than 2 months ago) and was a complete failure. So it'd better not be true. Hmph.

    how long will they keep it up?

    Due to the Germaine Effect, the Gruaniad has gone Celeb BB crazy. The whole of page 3 was taken up with Big Bro stuff today. I expect the other 'serious' papers did likewise.

    Assault course time

    The housemates have a task, it is to collect their shopping from an assault course. There are 10 obstacles and they have to collect a minimum of one item of the shopping from each of them.

    A flick thru the papers

    It is quite predictable that Jeremy 'Jez Jezzer' Edwards is the favourite to win as it says in the mirror today. Oh well, at least he was able to tell small child Kenzie who Germaine is. I think the small child Kenzie will win, those blazin squad fans all have about 5 mobiles topped up in preparation I would think.

    What Jeremy is famous for

    The sun say Brigitte wants Jez.

    Outrageous 6ft 1in Brigitte told hunky actor Jeremy: “You are very handsome, just my type. I love men like you.”

    Jeremy — once engaged to pop babe Rachel Stevens — earlier said of actress and model Brigitte: “I am a bit scared of her.”

    They also have nice pic of John with his man boobs out and say that Jeremy has one set of clothes after losing the others in the task.

    Oh yes, last nights programme did John call Jeremy a bit Julian and Sandy!

    Friday, January 07, 2005

    oh and another thing

    join the wd40 fan club Do no lose the little red straw. It's a bugger if you do.

    deeply irritating

    will Big Brother please call one of the HMs to the diary room, arm them with a big can of lube and get them go go and oil all those bastard squeaking doors.


    Thank you.

    Richard and Judy

    Whoever thought it was a good idea to hire Emma from BB5 for R&J was very wrong.

    'Germaine (except she didn't know her name) is just like Kitten' said a few times as it was so clever ahem.

    Also about Germaine 'Is she a muff?' said twice to bemusement all round. She meant 'milf' it turned out, as she helpfully started to explain 'mother I'd like to...' Judy Finnegan then shut her up.

    Charity and greedy buggers update

    Says in paper Brigitte's charity is a Brazilian street kids one.

    Plus I have just been to channel 4 and live t'internet streaming is £4.95 a month even though BB is only on for 18 days grr. The rest of the days you can watch wife swap and stuff...and you can buy special clips to watch for 50p a time!!!!


    first task

    Big Brother has given the celebs their first task. They'll be called into the Diary Room to answer questions about one of the other housemates. They'll have to forfeit an item of clothing for each question they get wrong. I think that it's an item of clothing from out of their suitcase, rather than being a strip-poker kind of vibe. But with Brigitte around, who knows.

    Fed's Forts

    Federico pontificates on the sleb housemates. Be amused by his sparkling wit. Or at least have a schadenfreude moment at him calling others 'nonentities'.

    What Kenzie has run away from

    Don't worry Kenzie you are safe from them all now.

    blazin' squad r tonk!, dey r fit n sexy howeva don't lik must b mad. i fink kenzie n strider r buff alwayz n 4eva xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    lizzie, feltham

    Da Squad r heavi!!..Da album is weighty..Its got really gud song onit..wid heavi beats..n all da ppl da disagree r jus h8erz ur jealous..u aint got wa da squad have got!! Nuff said hold it x
    Laydee M, Manchesta

    Jeremy the early favourite


    Jeremy Edwards 2/1
    Bez 4/1
    Kenzie 6/1
    Germaine Greer 7/1
    Brigitte Nielsen 12/1
    Caprice 14/1
    John McCririck 16/1
    Lisa I'Anson 25/1
    Any Other 10/1
    Someone to walk 3/1

    "Jeremy seems to be popular with punters as well as the ladies. In terms of temperament he seems to have the Joe Pasquale charm but couple this with his looks and he would seem almost unbeatable", said Hill's spokesman Rupert Adams.

    John is favourite for the first eviction (Lisa 2nd fave for eviction) and Bez the fave to walk.


    Da fans on da Offishul (not updated for months) Blazin Squad website message boards all seem to think Kenzie's birthday was yesterday (6th) as do the fine people at Blazin' Squad R Propa Fit.

    Day one from the papers

    Over at the sun John McCririck has offended Caprice by saying she's good looking and has had an easy life. Oh dear god wish someone would offend me like that.

    Jim Shelley in the mirror says it should be celebrity job club as only one of them is in full time work. They obviously don't think Germaine has a proper job.

    Mad mirror shouty writing

    NAME: Bez AGE: Ageless in a Dorian Gray kind of way AKA: Happy Mondays 'dancer'/dealer NICKNAME: Nutter ON SHOW BECAUSE: Adds a bit of (faded) street cred/mad (fer it) BONKERS FACTOR: 8 LOOK OUT FOR: Drugs intake ODDS ON WINNING: 8-1 SHELLEY'S VERDICT: Potentially legendary, anarchic

    The guardian lead with Germaine of course.

    Wearing a demure grey woollen ankle-length dress and peering out of her glasses like a headmistress, she spent her first moments in the house assessing her fellow housemates.

    Producers hope that she will have a similar presence on the show as journalist Janet Street-Porter in the recent I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! injecting an element of quirkiness.

    Dr Greer, who said she agreed to take part to raise money for her rain forest, has previously described watching Big Brother as being "as dignified as looking through the keyhole in your teenage child's bedroom door".


    Says on the bbc site that James 'Kenzie' Mackenzie's birthday is on Monday not yesterday ooh!


    Bet you didn’t know: People think that he modelled himself on Gareth Gates and it makes him MAD! He’s a complete chatterbox and started MC-ing when he was 13

    Thursday, January 06, 2005

    I gotta bike fer me birfday

    The Blazin Squad. In case any of you (not so hip) guys out there didn't know who 'Kenzie' was. Posted by Hello

    BB's B

    Brigitte 'Ballbreaker' Nielsen, enters the BB house. Notice how Davina got her name pronounciation wrong. Hmph. Little kenzie better be scared. Posted by Hello

    My turn!

    John 'bitty' McCririck - Will moan about missing Newcastle play very soon.

    Germaine Greer - umm did she say something about anal sex in her intro?

    Mark 'Bez' Berry - my sister wants him to win nuff said.

    Caprice - wonder(bra)woman I saw a bbc3 docu about her few years ago seems ok.

    Lisa I'Anson - sacked from radio one years ago after going awol in Ibiza. We will laugh at her and she will never live down her intro.

    Jeremy 'Rachel Stevens ex' Edwards - oh my, I recognised his dog from heat magazine as soon as it came on camera. The shame.

    Kenzie - he's 12 or something (ok 19 today). Run away small child there are scary ladies about.

    Brigitte Nielsen - eep.


    (What will Dermot say)?

    well, well, well

    First impressions

    • Davvy - Sherlock Holmes is so not a good look

    • John McCririck - oh dear oh dear oh dear. Can't even get the Panto Villain routine right (mind you if he could, he'd probably be in Panto right now instead of on BB). I have no wish to know anymore about his penchant for intermammary frottage nor about his wife Booby. T.M.I.

    • Germaine Greer - speechless

    • Caprice - oh

    • Bez - madfrit sorted madchester etc etc. My (Manc born and bred) son is on hand to offer translations for non-Mancs. Hello, Rowetta, will we be seeing you later on BBLB?

    • Lisa I'anson - blimey, one they kept quiet. I expect Germaine will be bitterly jealous of both her intellect and her sexual hold over men.

    • Jeremy Edwards - who? practical joker yawn

    • Kenzie - yeah whatever

    • Brigitte Nielsen - she is what most of the others imagine they are, ie genuinely mad, unpredictable and really quite frightening. I wonder if her and Germaine will have a cat fight over Kenzie's affections, or will they share him and Jon between them in the sauna? Hope Brigitte packed birch twigs as her luxury.

    It's gonna be a great 18 days.

    summer holiday?

    If you haven't booked your hols yet and fancy a few weeks in a tv studio instead, Big Brother 6 auditions are starting soon. Details on C4 site. How low will you go to get on TV?

    50p! update

    Radio 1 News reports that half of the 50p cost of Celebrity Big Brother vote will go to charity. 16p per vote will be split equally among each celebrity housemates' nominated charity, the remaining profits (9p per vote) will go to the appeal to help victims of the Asia Tsunami disaster.

    Or you could just give your 50 pees directly to the charity of your choice.

    No good advice

    My advice to the celebs bravely entering the big brother house tonight.

    If you are boring then stay at home.

    If you are American don't bang on about it.

    Drink cider it is good for you.

    Choose these two weeks to have a breakdown you won't regret it.

    Live your life in the house like a Girls Aloud or Scissor Sisters song and you can do no wrong (hanging round the kitchen in your underwear or being a classy honey kissy huggy lovey dovey ghetto princess/acid junkie college flunky dirty puppy daddy bastard, ALWAYS GOOD.

    Remember at all times your aim is to make the front of the tabloids.


    I do like the night before a reality show when you don't know who exactly will be on it. It's like Xmas Eve woo hoo! Then when you see the actual people it is like Xmas Day night when you are stuffed and feel sick. Only joking, I'm sure they will be fabulous 'celebs'.

    According to one of our fine tabloids the celebs don't want to be filmed in the showers, strange as they never have been in previous ones anyway. Also rumoured is the first 'task' a medieval themed banquet on Friday.

    The house will be turned into a castle and the celebs will have to dress up in costumes with the girls wearing sexy bodices to drive the men wild.

    One unlucky star will be placed in the stocks for the rest of the group to throw tomatoes at.

    Ooh Germaine in her bodice and John McCririck in the stocks, can't wait.

    Wednesday, January 05, 2005


    It costs 50p to vote in celebrity big brother! So that's 25p for the celebs charity then 25p costs is it? I guess so. I know it will be 50p as it says so in an article about the fact that 9p per call will go to the tsunami disaster appeal. It also says some celebs have chosen that as their charity (don't hold me to charity gets 25p from a call I'm just guessing). Obviously no one round here will be voting...unless I get drunk of course. If you feel the urge to text like me you can also text (in the U.K) a £1.50 donation to the tsunami appeal by texting "donate" to 83321 and all of that goes to charity.

    "a popular beat combo, m'lud" (part II)

    wonderbra model and lads' mags fave

    Mark Bosnich
    Mark Bosnich
    or "disgraced former Chelsea goal keeper Mark Bosnich" to give him his full title. Used to take drucks with go out with our Sophie

    Brigitte Nielsen
    Brigitte Nielsen
    Actress, ex-wife of Sly Stalone, gets nekkid at slightest provocation. Terrifying. [Insert 'Great Dane' joke here].

    Getting Bored Now.
    Antoine De Caunes = French bloke from Eurotrash
    John McCririck = annoying twunt racing bloke on C4 (silly hats etc)
    Germaine Greer = feminist, academic, Australian, Late Review regular, not going on the show really at least I hope not
    Jason Orange = ex-Take That
    Silly Clazza getting her Emma B's mixed up, if it's to appear on a trashy reality tv show then it will be model Emma B ex or current (one of those) of E17 Brian Harvey who fled the jungle innit?

    Anyway my top secret sources say Caprice (yawn) is flying in. I swear it said that last time Celeb BB was on. Also former Libertines' frontman Pete Doherty. Now I wonder what he would need the cash for? Has anyone told him you have to survive on cider in the BB house?

    "a popular beat combo, m'lud" (part I)

    The High Court Judges' guide to the possible Celebrity Big Brother contenders ...

    Chris Parker
    Chris Parker
    'baby faced actor', sacked from playingSpencer Moon in EastEnders, was on Strictly Come Dancing - Chris Parker search @ Sky Showbiz News

    Craig Charles
    Craig Charles
    oh come on, even you know who Craig Charles is, surely? Red Dwarf, Robot Wars, BBC6 Funk Show. Maybe if he is on sleb BB, he'll get his website working again

    Eddie Irvine
    Eddie Irvine
    retired racing driver, Formula 1 'playboy' apparantly, his website's here

    Happy Mondays' Bez. (people who live in a Heat-free world may wish to note the X-Factor connection).

    DJ Emma B Spice Emma B does she know her top's unravelling Emma B
    Emma B
    as mentioned before, I get me Emma B's all mixed up. Seems like it's probably the underwear model one who didn't go into the jungle.

    Myleene Klass
    Myleene Klass
    was in Hear'Say, now a classical babe

    Sam Fox
    Sam Fox
    well dur. Glamour model, pop star and star of The Club.

    member of popular beat combo Blazin' Squad

    ok enuff for now, more later maybe

    First betting news

    from the lovely peeps at

    Chris Parker 5/1
    Craig Charles 5/1
    Eddie Irvine 11/2
    Bez 6/1
    Emma B 8/1
    Myleene Klass 8/1
    Sam Fox 8/1
    Kenzie 9/1

    The New Year is barely a few days old, and already the first dose of realtiy television is about to start with the return of Celebrity Big Brother. As usual the producers are trying their hardest to keep the names of the contestants under wraps, although a few bookmakers have already begun publishing odds.

    Some of the celebrities rumoured to be taking part are are Caprice, Chris Parker, Brigitte Nielsen, Craig Charles, Antoine De Caunes, Germaine Greer. Also expected to take his place in the line-up is former professional goalkeeper Mark Bosnich who was recently seen in The Match.

    Of the above, it is the names of Chris Parker and Craig Charles that appear at the top of the early betting lists. Parker came second in the first series of Strictly Come Dancing.

    There is even some talk of former Take That member Jason Orange looking to emulate the success Mark Owen had in the last series. The show begins on Thursday 6th January, and as usual will be keeping track of the betting movements.

    Tuesday, January 04, 2005

    yes, Bez (well maybe)

    Brother, it's Bez

    says so in Madchester News so must be true innit.

    WITH the festivities barely over, the new year's first dose of reality TV is set to hit our screens with the return of Celebrity Big Brother and Manchester's very own superstar of the streets, Bez, will be hoping to win the nation's heart .

    As usual producers are determined to keep the names of contestants secret until the show airs on January 6th, but some of the contestants rumoured to be taking part are Caprice, Brigitte Nielsen, Craig Charles, Antoine De Caunes, Germaine Greer and Bez.

    Ex-Chelsea goalkeeper Mark Bosnich has been lined up to replace Frank McAvennie who was apparently dropped after discussing his likely appearance with the press, and even ex-BBC Director General Greg Dyke has been reported to be making an appearance.
    Other celebrities rumoured to be involved with Celebrity Big Brother 3 include Kerry McFadden, Jo Brand and Jason Orange ...

    Germaine Greer?!?!?! Janet S-P on IAC I can just about take but GG on Sleb BB ?!??!

    Lee Chapman Says No

    Female First reports that Mr Leslie Ash has decided against going into the BB house.

    Chapman has jumped off out just days before the Celebrity Big Brother hits our screens on Thursday leaving the shows producers Endemol desperately short of big hitters for the show.

    Lee Chapman 44 is married to actress Leslie Ash, and has according to the sun newspaper turned down £100,000 to appear on the reality program, with a freind telling the paper the money offers weren’t quite right and he had doubts about some housemates.
    Favorite to replace Victoria [Silvstedt - see below] is the ex-Hear’Say stunner Myleene Klass. The list so far is looking rather thin, and C4 have admitted that the withdrawals are turning into a nightmare and the producers are deserate to get a number of big names on board. At the moment the only one that appear to have confirmed are Brigitte Nielsen, John McCririck, Mark Bosnich, Kenzie from Blazin’ Squad and Bez from Happy Mondays.

    Undecided: Carole Caplin, Faria Alam, Myleene Class, and Eddie Ervine.
    No's: Holly Valance and David Ike refusingLee Chapman.

    Looking more and more like No David Icke. Boo.

    David Icke

    Someone just emailed me to say the gossip in his office is that David Icke will not be on Sleb BB. I will be gutted if this is right. I was so looking forward to the goal keeping, lizard fighting, conspiracy theorist being on my tv.


    another year, another reality tv show. My NY resolution to spend less time in front of tv/computer screens has been broked already. Celebrity Big Bro starts on Thursday woo hooooo!

    Some 'who the slebs will/won't be' rumours ...

  • Model Victoria Silvstedt pulls out of Celebrity Big Brother
    Swedish underwear model Victoria Silvstedt has pulled out of Channel 4's 'Celebrity Big Brother' three days before the show is due to start, as former Chelsea goal keeper Mark Bosnich and former Happy Monday dancer and maracas player Bez have been added to the line-up. .... They will be joined by 1980s actress and former wife of Sylvester Stallone, Brigette Nielsen, who has made a splash in the US reality television programme 'The Surreal Life'. Kiss-and-tell queen Alicia Douvall, who cites P Diddy, Simon Cowell and 'EastEnders' star Dean Gaffney among her conquests, and former Libertines' frontman Pete Doherty are also reported to star in the show -- although they have not yet been confirmed.

    Celebrities in talks about appearing include "Son of God" David Icke, shamed footballer Mark Bosnich and racing pundit John McCririck. Models Caprice, Sam Fox and Victoria Silvstedt have also been approached, along with gay rights activist Peter Tatchell, Leslie Ash's husband Lee Chapman and Brigitte Nielsen. Channel 4 said: "If any fights break out, there will be people on the ground to deal with it." Cherie Blair's adviser Carole Caplin and Nancy Dell'Olio have declined to appear on the show.

    SOCCER idol Frank McAvennie revealed his fears yesterday that producers have given him the boot from Celebrity Big Brother. The former Celtic and West Ham player, renowned for his love of 'the burdz', was hoping for a last minute reprieve after TV chiefs went cold on the idea of putting him into the house. But he fears he has been pipped to the post by eccentric racing pundit John McCririck and goalie-turned new age prophet David Icke. ...
    SPECULATION has been rife about the final line-up, with 18 names linked with the show. They include: Red Dwarf star Craig Charles, Sylveste Stallone's ex-wife Brigitte Nielsen, left, former sports commentator and self-proclaimed 'Son of God' David Icke and Channel 4 racing pundit John McCririck. Others tipped to appear are ex-footballers Mark Bosnich and Lee Chapman; along with glamour girls Victoria Silvstedt, Sam Fox, Caprice, Michelle Marsh and Abi Titmuss. Others linked to the show include gay rights activist Peter Tatchell; Cherie Blair's lifestyle guru Carole Caplin; Hear'Say singer turned classical pianist Myleene Klass; shamed comic Michael Barrymore; mum Mandy Allwood who miscarried octuplets and Sven Goran Eriksson's lovers Nancy Del Olio and Faria Alam.

  • Monday, January 03, 2005

    shall we?

    sleb bb starts on Thursday ... is this gonna be a sleb bb blog?