Big Mouth

James Corden and Matthew Horne are the new Big Brother's Big Mouth presenters but it doesn't make it clear if it's just for Celebrity Hijack next month. I'm not keen on them anyway and Gavin & Stacey is a bit rubbish too. Other things I'm not keen on are Cerys Matthews in her pants in tabloids. Urgh.

Pete Burns joy

Presenting Big Mouth this week and due to be on Wife Swap.

Vileness and soft toys

Lesley (BB8) on Big Mouth 'I can't tell the difference between Charley and Brian' added to her 'Charley is playing the race card' remark on BBLB I've quite gone off her!

Poor Gerry, his monkey was put in a condom last night... poor monkey. Chanelle's Betsy was as well but Betsy obviously enjoyed it as Chanelle wasn't upset (for once).

Tonight - rumours blah Davina blah cash money blah secret lofts blah the usual blah.

I don't like Brian

Too sweary and wears things saying 'romeo 1' and 'no 1 Essex boy' on them. I think that's enough reason to dislike someone on BB.

The others... Liam seems too normal for BB (which probably means as he's a bloke he'll win) and Jonathan seems too rich. I love the way people think him (Mr Moneybags) and Carole should get together, I bet he'd be very upset to hear that (his friend on Big Mouth said he'd be more interested in Charley, well duh). I liked the way Nikki (BB7 not BB8 one) kept slagging off Billi (the other newbie) on Big Mouth in front of his family and friends.

There are now too many people you just know there will be 5 left on the last night and it will be stupid and rushed, plus it will probably be 5 blinking men.

Poor mad Shabnam 80ish% vote that's not right.

The new ones are currently in the rainy garden seemingly (mostly no sound) practising YMCA for a task.

Britain's got talent is rubbish I am now watching a bit of it and it is bad. Mini musical singers and ghastly pre teen dancing. Urgh urgh urgh. Today I am mostly thinking about this . Both The Sun and The Mirror went with 'Britain's got pervert(s)'.

news round up

I forgot to watch Project Runway last night so don't know if Ugly Betty's nephew is still in.

Asia won Search for the next Pussycat Doll hurrah she beat nasty Melissa. Robyn said all 3 finalists were 'in touch with their inner Pussycat Doll'. As they seem to have spend most of the series forgetting to put their clothes on on top of their undies before going on stage, I fear we are all in danger of bing in touch with the finalists' inner pussycat dolls.

And talking of pussycats (heh did you see what I did there), George Galloway is reported to be the new BBBM presenter. This news makes me very happy, as it will help me stay away from the whole sordid BB8 mess this summer. Even better, Chris "where's the off button?" Moyles is going to be doing it later in the series. No BBBM for me this year.

Meanwhile, tabloids say:
YOU'RE SIRED! Apprentice blonde's passion for married man
Apprentice' star Tre advised to cheer up taking advice from Syed would be such a great career move

and big brother news is everywhere, but I can't be arsed.

Urgh

Danielle saying her and Jade were best mates when Jade had said previously that they'd met three times. Someone is lying. That row between Shilpa and Jade and Danielle it was so rubbish and convenient for BB as there seemed to be 5 - 10 mins to fill! Like Jade has been told to start fighting... Leo's walking is the best bit of the series it was hilarious. Not so funny Jade and her toyboy in bed shown on BBBM. EWW EWW EWW EWW I may be scarred for life.

I think even I'm bored of BB now...

Julien's back!

Being a fickle cow with a short attention span, I am bored of CBB now. Actually I'm bored of all the stoopid twisty turny things they do to make it 'better' and I'm way bored of Jade et al. But most of all I'm scared of the amount of time the feckin show takes up these days. To do it justice you have to do BBLB (half an hour), the highlights show (1 hour) and BBBM (half an hour). That's 2 hours a day commitment even before you add in the live coverage available to a work-at-home digibox owning gal. What I'm trying to say is, I'm too much of a lightweight to give CBB the attention it deserves.

So hurrah for return of Project Catwalk, one hour a week max of The Joy of Bitching masterclass. Very silly task last night, tho: make a dress for TPT out of some other dress. Christine got the push, but it should've been Tymoor for making a bad dress and having a ludicrous name. Ludicrous names are over-represented on the show, although normally named Fetish Designer of the Year Wayne won with a dress that showed the model's @rse. I think Monica's dress was bestest meself.

Note to Sky tho, finishing your PC2 site before the show launches would be good, as 'undefined' splashed all over your webpage is so not a good look. Oh and also de-red-eyeing people's photos, that would be good too. Maybe even employing a photographer to take the pics to avoid red-eye (cos hey it's so hard to find one in fashionland). Where's our attention to detail, people? Julien would be apalled.

In other news: my 7 year old can barely contain himself now he's started seeing trailers for the return of Dancing on Ice.

David to win! Maybe...

Who'd of thought David Gest would be the normal one? Or is that just me? I don't quite understand 'She's got her head in her vagina' (or some variation of that) but it was an interesting first programme quote!

Other good DG things include calling Lauren Booth 'Cherie' at all times. I like Lauren Booth being saved from a spider by Myleene Klass but that hasn't happened yet on the main bit as I have a time travel machine it was on the teatime extra programme.

The new ITV2 show is quite rubbish. But it had some people from Big Brother's Big Mouth on it which was amusing. Don't just rip off another programme, steal the people off it as well!

I'm a celebrity ALERT

The teaser ads are on ITV1.

It may start Monday 13th November.

TPT and Mark Duerden Smith/that bloke who was on it last year have been dropped in favour of what sounds like a Big Brother's Big Mouth type show on ITV2. Actually as much as I love MDS and TPT the ITV2 show was due an axe last year let alone this one.

I hope Jasmine 'Nightmare' Lennard and Rachel 'Munter' Hunter (Jasmine's words not mine) are both on I think they have both been rumoured.

Ridicule is nothing to be scared of

Except on reality tv. Ho ho. Adam Ant to appear on 'Celebrity Big Brother'? At last I may be able to spy on Adam Ant 24 hours a day my 12 year old self would be happy. But then is reality tv a place for 'troubled' people? I think not.

It's the weekend that means me glued to reality tv

SCD - Spoony out hurrah. Well done to judge Bruno Tonioli for saying 'the hills are alive with the sound of bullshit' before 6pm. That was the best bit. I love Bruno.

X Factor - 4sure out boo. I hate Ben. I hate Ben. I hate Ben.

On X Factor Aftermath (it's a show!) when Ben appeared they played Creep hahaha I was very happy about that. Sunday Mirror blah blah Ben sex addict blah...

Anna's suspicions were confirmed when she found love notes from Siobhan to Ben, calling herself his "beautiful Princess Mermaid of the sea".

Eww.

On make me a sooperdooper model they rather cruelly got rid of Jono aka mini Russell from Big Brothers Big Mouth. James is my fave though I liked him in his Asda uniform on the first show.

Five, you are spoiling us

Hurrah I'm back in reality teevee land with the return of Make me a supermodel - now with added Boyz! and now with added Supermodel's Big Mouth Little Brother featuring Anthony "who?" Crank and Jasmine "don't you know who I am?" Lennard and her dodgy wig collection.


And then, as if that wasn't enough excitement, during the show I see trailers for Sleb Salon! "Trust Me I'm a Beauty Therapist" Suzie Quattro gives colonic irrigation!?!?! Starts tonight at 11, crack back & sac fans

The final day

Hmm how does Richard know the percentage Sezer got? I wonder... big mouth Nikki strikes again me thinks! I think he may even know about the other Sezer thing. Nikki has been telling Pete all the gossip as well... Jennie thinks her and Aisleyne are first ones out. Richard seems to think it's between everyone but Aisleyne. Hopefully Aisleyne will beat Jennie, Nikki and Richard at least. I don't see her winning, people have been brainwashed by Pete to win for too long.

But obviously

Vote Aisleyne!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



A few Aisleyne to win column type things.

Grace Dent in the Radio Times.

Tim Teeman in The Times.

Emzi Tingay at Digi Spy

Having said all that of course the most important thing today is Trin's birthday. Happy Birthday Trinno!

More rubbish

Jennie has won today's task and now has a free pass to the final week! Grr. Annoyed once more I am. Oh and SURPRISE Pete 'won' a letter from home. Hmm...

I have read a rumour that Jennie will choose the ex housemate (from the house next door) to go in...

I hate this ex housemate twist, seeing Grraccieee and Lisa on teevee made me feel sick and then Lisa saying on BBBM that she'd beat Aisleyne up! Lisa really is one thick EX (and staying that hopefully) housemate.

goodbye BB from Trin

Two weeks extra and it's absolute crap. Big Brother launches into the final two weeks with the worst idea yet. To bring back 4 of the housemates we evicted (because we didn't like them) and force us to watch their oh so (not) amusing antics for another week?
Nope, I shall not be watching again. I spent money voting every single one of those awful fame hungry, mentally unstable people out. I have no desire to see any of them again.
If they wanted to keep Nikki in they should have done something abut the vile Jayne in the first place rather than let her go on and on and on imparting information about the outside world to Nikki and the others.
This is grossly unfair. The person going back in will have tons of information about how HM's are perceived by us, about what the press thinks of them, tactics and game plans. This isn't what BB was all about. This is a farce.
Lisa threatened to 'beat up Ais' on BBBM last night encouraged by the child like and dim Nikki.
Anyway... Hasn't she sold her suitcase on eBay? Chav cow she is.
I have been a staunch BB fan since the start but it's just another dull game show. Bring back Strike It Lucky. It's got more common sense.

Happy Birthday Richard

Nice party. So they are out of prison and much crying over the letters from home so much amusement for us viewers.

Now on to important news. I don't like Jennie. I want to like her but I just can't. It may be her mothers fault she sounded a right cow on BBBM. I like it when the friends and family turn me against a housemate! This isn't helping either, urgh creeping round Pete. Glyn is annoying me now too and Spiral after his latest kick off at Aisleyne. No need. I dread to think what he would be like if he drank.

I hope Susie and Susie Junior stay tonight (and Richard obviously). I think nicecupofteaandasitdown.com should adopt Susie as spokeswoman.

Who will it beeeeeeeeeeee

From big blagger pics and details of the kit kat people.

A few of them -

Matt - ex internet stripper and self confessed virgin.

Nad - friend of Calum Best.

Sue - Aussie DJ her station (in Ireland) bought 13000 Kit Kats.

Su - Grandmother her children are mortified.

Wayne J - Blackpool! I'd have to support someone from BP.

Rachel - from news of the world that could be quite amusing. Maybe.

...

Last night - spin the bottle eww Imogen and Grace decided they were far too respectable and went to bed early leaving Nikki to be very drunk and Lea to get upset when Pete said he fancied Ashlean (Aisleyne) more or something. Oh and Glyn was about to run around the garden nekkid but Imogen said something in Welsh and he put his boxers on. Before I and G went to bed there was a very tedious exchange of who would sleep with who and do what to who (zzzzzzzz) and then they went to bed and Lea was gross and Glyn was having the time of his life. The usual.

And I'm not even mentioning BBBM but I did not approve of them showing that clip! Poor Sam.

Let's count them

Makosi makes three (Kate and Becki being the others) that I have heard of linked to an 'affair' with Russell Brand. Wonder how many it will be by the end of the series. Speaking of RB hurrah it's a BBBM day!

Bonnie evicted

Poor thing she didn't stand a chance even though she did provide the first laughs of the series with the pronunciation of her name.

Davina was awful but I don't like her (for the past few years) so I am biased. The Dawn bashing on BBLB and the eviction show by the presenters makes me annoyed. Grr.

BBBM was good as usual. The official BB Dawn boycott probably includes Big Mouth but I'd like to see her on it like Shahbaz was tonight.

Something is happening on Monday... new/old housemates?

monochrome set, my friends

Is it against C4 by-laws for anyone on BBLB to wear colour? Dermot, Nadia, AnTHony, the bloke off queer eye, the audience ... the only one wearing colour was queer eye guy's dog.

In other news, I watched 10 mins of live streaming last night during which Nikki was expressing astonishment on hearing that her tits might be in the papers and her friends and family on BBBM, of which she claims never to have heard. Has she not watched BB before? Has she no tv? Does she not read the papers (or at least look at the pictures therein)? Or is she possibly not quite 100% for real?

Oh yes I have a complaint

No BBLB or BBBM on Monday! I suppose it's because there is this new one 'Big Brothers Big teevee 'experts' speaking the bleeding obvious' or whatever it is called! I've never really liked the psychology shows and I've already gone without BBBM since Friday... Poor me, poor me, pour me a drink indeed!

Big Brother's Big Brain Mondays, 11.05pm A new live show presented by Dermot O'’Leary, BBBB puts the housemates on the couch for intensive analysis. Our terribly brainy psychologists dissect the housemates' behaviour and conduct 'experiments' in the House. Watching this will will make you more clever. Fact.

Wonder what the experiments will be? Hopefully the draize test on Sezer and Mikey.