Ron Jeremy exhausted after another solid night of masturbation.
His hands need to be soaked in a cocktail of anti bacterial and fungal solution afterwards for at least 3/4 hour.
Straight after the love island comes Channel Five's answer to the Funny Farm. The funny farm being a place where crazy people get together, and channel 5's programme strikingly similar.
Not sure whose the craziest. Keith with his hand up a birds ass all day. Lionel with the mouth of a tourette sufferer. Flav who is scarily unstable and wears hoodies and caps (ban him) and is unbelievably thick. Ron Jeremy, the sex stud whose life of shagging, mirrors in his haggard face.
The Barbie dolls, The two Emma's a bit like the two ronnies without the laughs (and more hair)
Fuck, tonight we have poetry there too. A bit less sugary than the love island crap though but still heavily sickening. Ron's offered to massage anyone.... with those hands ewwww.
So two people are for the chop tonight. You know what would make it more exciting? If the chop was real. How I'd love to see that ducks head guillotined off.
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