The High Court Judge's Guide to the new IACGMOOH cast

from left to right¹

Matt Willis
was in popular beat combo Busted, now 'pursuing a solo career' hem hem. Proved his sleb credentials by going to the Priory (then left two weeks later after deciding he didn't really have a drink problem after all). Official website borken but he is so down with the kids his record company have made a myspace page for him

Phina Oruche
actress off “Footballers' Wives”, Wikipedia doesn't know about her. Very bonny lass but probably wants to lay off the lipgloss a bit in the jungle.





David Gest
“yeaaah, David”, this year's Jackie
Was married to Liza Minelli, had the worst plastic surgeon ever. TV bods worried his face might melt in da jungle.





Lauren Booth
daughter of randy scouse git, half sister of Cherie, journo & pro-celebrity smoker. This year's Carol Thatcher








Toby Anstis
aka “the Tobester” (ick) - kids' TV presenter & radio dj & dance sensation








Faith Brown
Actress & comedienne, used to appear in tv variety shows before they were abolished, once had her own chat show.













Scott Henshall
fashion designer who not even Wikipedia has heard of, designed the most expensive dress in the world











Myleene Klass
was in Popstars band Hear'say, then reinvented herself as a classical babe. Does the Classic FM breakfast show on Sunday, so the classic fm crew will be biggin her up in da jungle innit. Gets my vote if she plays some nice Chopin nocturnes on the jungle piano.





Jason Donovan
OK everyone knows who he is – Scott in Neighbours, sang “Too many broken hearts”, not a gay, Joseph.















Jan Leeming
BBC newsreader, another one you should've heard of, this year's Jenny Bond


















1. I may have got Matt & Toby the wrong way round but I'm sure Jude will be along to get things right, she have her finger on da pulse and I don't