just close Sam

The Restaurant is starting to annoy me now, with its foolish tasks the 'bottom three' have to do, to give the rubbish-but-good-telly couples a chance to stay in when it's obv to anyone that Raymond Blanc¹ should just fire close them there and then.

In fact they should get their own jazz drumsticks shoved up their arse after last night's² performance, where Sam was too busy getting his drum kit out to do any cooking (even if he could, which he can't) then blamed his chef-underling for the evening's disaster and sacked him. And and and flippin Jacqui, instead of telling him to pull himself together and stop pissing about, strokes his arm and his ego and mops his poor brow and tells him how brilliant he is, then turns up her perkiness to 11 in an effort to cover up the horribleness.

But instead of just chucking him off, Sam and Jacqui go into the challenge with 2 other couples, and probably they will survive because they make good telly whereas the Bolton couple are less photogenic and so will probably get closed. Bah bah bah.


1. as voiced by Edouard laPaglie - look at the front of his 'arse
2. or this morning's by the power of BBC iPlayer