Gabby the new Queen of Hearts

Could the judges and (some) fans of Strictly please stop moaning about two of the chosen ones being in the bottom two especially the judges who don't seem to realise they are on a popularity contest on the tv. The result was brilliant except Penny needed to go out.

The main thing is that James Jordan the mean pig dancer is out. Ha hahahaha. I really don't like him...

tracking monkeys with lasers

New series of Beauty and the Geek has started on E4 and although I hate the premise of the show (it is not, in fact, impossible for girls to be both smart and beautiful; boys too, of course). I'm loving most of the geeks (although none of this lot track monkeys with lasers booo). Fave so far is Nate, what's not to love about someone who's in a Star Wars tribute band? The editing of the girls is so annoying tho, surely no-one could be that dumb and still able to walk and breathe at the same time?

Anyways I'm auditioning for the UK series, although not sure whether as a beauty or a geek

15 days

new series of I'm a Celebrity starts on 12 November. Yay-ish. Bit worried about the quality of guests, last rumour I heard was Dennis Rodman gah plus masses of people I have never heard off plus maybe Richard Fairbrass (Daz ads obviously not paying enough). Not that it matters so long as The Geordie Messiahs are presenting, phone-in scandal or no phone-in scandal (just because they're exec producers doesn't mean they know what's going on, obv). On our holidays in Whitley Bay, the kids entertainers were always The Next Ant 'n' Dec to me. They were great at what they were doing and as they hoofed their way through the Macarena (again), I couldn't help thinking they dreamed of this year Whitley Bay, next year The World!

Brandon Block alert

I see he's been snuck into the Celeb Scissorhands cast, excellent news. There are far too many reality tv things on tonight - Strictly, Runway, America's next top and Scissorhands... grr.

Excellent X Factor result smug Daniel out and some mad songs - build me up buttercup and stayin alive... what the feck? and Strictly slight spoiler............................... interesting bottom two on Strictly I read on the net... mwahahahahaha.

Poor Leon

Who the hell chose that for him? Odd. Predictably after hating Same Difference I now love them, I'm all for a Steps revival at any time. I hope all the kiddies who like High School Musical vote for them. My fave bit was when Dermot kissed the bloke. Anyway Same Difference for Eurovision please.

How could you not like a man like this?

Ok I hated him the first (and second and third) time I saw him but at least he is different from the others. From The Mirror

He goes around in a black balaclava when he's about to perform, like something from the IRA, so he doesn't catch a cold."

I hope Rhydian doesn't go out of the X Factor tonight he needs to stay for amusement.

Michael Barry says: "Rhydian told me they sent him an email telling him to arrive between 11am and 12pm - and sent everyone else one that said to arrive at 10am. Then they show him being told off for arriving late. It's a nasty way to treat a talented young man."

That makes me laugh the thought they told Rhydian a different time so they could film him being late and arrogant.

Look what's on Dave

The Apprentice series one tonight. I'm tempted to record even though I have it on dvd from ebay, except I lent it to my sister and she never gave it back hmph. Dave has gone up in my estimation now.

so what was the point?

Bloody Mardy Jeremy and Weepy Jane won. Obviously on the final challenge, while perky twins Jess and Laura were organising themselves, decorating their restaurant, planning menus, buying food, cooking it, etc etc, Jane was crying and Jeremy was like a rabbit trapped in the headlights at the market. Have to give Jezza credit tho, as he patted a wailing Jane on the shoulder and supportively gave out some flyers for her.

OK yes so I know it's all in the edit and we don't even see the half of it. But why was it edited to make Jeremy and Jane look so bastard useless when they were The Chosen Ones? And indeed why bother to go through the whole of the last 8 weeks with challenges and such, when Raymond could've just decided in week 1, as his main criteria seems to have been who cooked the ponciest food. Yes he has chosen to go into business with a man who thinks cooking on the telly is scarier than fighting in Afghanistan.

I feel robbed.

bloody Jeremy's going to bloody win!

Oh no bad Raymond bad bad bad for firing lovely Laura and not-quite-so-lovely Grant. Now the final is between the PerkyTwins and Mr MoodyChops and I have a horrible feeling Moody Jezza's poncey food is going to appeal to Raymond more than the Wholesome Twins' wholesome whole foods and so Jeremy will win aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh

won't it be luvverly

Professional cockney sparrow Martine McCutcheon is going to be a judge in The Lord's next tv show My Fair Lady. I bloody love that fillum. I'm a good girl I am.

quelle travesty!

belated Restaurant news. Last week's challenge was Lloyd & Adwoa vs Grant & Laura. wtf? how did it happen that one of those two (who should be the 2 finalists imo) is getting eliminated when mardy-bastard-Jeremy is safe into the next round? Anyway Lloyd & Adwoa got closed, which was the right decision 'on the night', on the basis of the particulalry stoopid 'singles night' challenge. Jeremy must go this week, final to be Grant & Lovely Laura vs the Perky Twins, Perky Twins to get marked down for perkiness in excess of legal limits (two further offences of bubbly blondeness also taken into consideration), lovely Laura to give birth immediately after winning the final and name the baby Jacque-Raymond.

Celeb BB replacement...

Hmm... from the offish site.

Big Brother's been hijacked!

Many celebrities have caused chaos ON Big Brother, but in January 2008 - for the first time ever - a rogues gallery of stars, slebs and boffins will be seizing control to actually BECOME Big Brother.

From dictating tasks to interrogating inmates and controlling nominations the great, good and ghastly will be ripping up the rule book, holding rewards to ransom and generally creating mayhem alongside the REAL Big Brother in 'Big Brother: Celebrity Hijack.'

Their willing hostages? A houseful of Britain's most exceptional and extraordinary 18 to 21 year olds.

Over the next few weeks Big Brother will be combing the UK's hottest young artists, athletes, scientists, musicians, entrepreneurs, fashion gurus and dons in every other field to assemble a cast of pure prodigies.

If you're aged 18 to 21 and think you've got the talent it takes, make sure you come back here later this week for full details on how to apply.

Screeeeeeeeeeam

America's Next Top Model is on Freeview!!!!!! At last!!!!! (Virgin 1) Of course it is on a Sunday, day of Runway and SCD but I will find a way to watch it. My fave programme ever Seinfeld is on before it too.

Project Dogwalk

I hope you didn't miss the doggy dress-up fest, Judeee.

Fabulous episode description from Gothamist (warning spoiler for dog episode in case you've recorded it). And Gothamist has this mouthwatering note ....

And next week is the episode where someone gets kicked out. There were suspicions that the designer would be booted because of some portfolio discrepancies, but based on the previews, which included Kayne saying, "I don't understand" what's going on and Robert replying that there are very strict/clear (we think) rules about what they can and cannot do. So it sounds more like the removed designer is doing drugs, sabotaging someone else or something along those lines.

Oh for fecks sake

Been waiting for Project Runway to be on for two weeks on Sky 3... When is it on? When Strictly and the X Factor are on the other sides tomorrow... ARGH! I have already read the results for Strictly (the BBC will get what is coming to them one day for messing with the Strictly format/Sunday results/Saturday recording) and the X Factor on Digi Spy but I still have to watch/record them. I think Project is repeated... Sigh...